Lena Dunham, the Taliban Shuffle and the Muppets (2024)

Yes your eyes flickering to the vision of endless gifs, tweets and two-minute videos is over...I know it is sad. Horrible really. Now you have to go off and enoy your weekend and stuff. but do not despair because the revolution in pop culture continues this weekend....With the GUIDE. Get your copy this weekend!

While supplies last.

This teaser music video thing. Is now a thing. Here is the full track from Redlight’s Raekwon collaboration.

Call it a parting gift.

Pharrell’s hat adventures come to a close. But your’s could be just begining. That is if you have an extra $10,500 to join in on the eBay auction.

Worth considering as the hat is said to turn you into a mountie.

Instant mountie.

Mounties are awesome.

Worth every penny.

Disclaimer: horse not included. Huskey not included. Screaming girls. Never say never.

It’s sort of dark out now.

This is a crying shame. A crying shame.

So what’s my presciption for CNN: let’s take a break from self-aggrandising British personalities who secretly think all Americans (well 99%) are insolent jerks and let this guy host Live.

His political correctness is just so right.

In 2011 Propublica journalist Kim Barker wrote a book about her experiences in Afghanistan and Pakistan. The Guardian was there, the Wallstreet Journal was there but Barker had a slightly different take on exactly what was going on.

Referring to warlord Abduh Rashid Dostum as:

...capricious and known for switching sides like a celebrity changing hair colo(u)r.

She describes getting herself into the trade of highly restricted materials.

I repeatedly apoogised for the Laundry incident. I had loaned one of the Afghan women who ran the place a Pilates DVD.

From laundering exercise tapes to pointing out bad dye jobs, Kim Barker describes her experience in as the Taliban Shuffle.



She calls them strange days and although they may not have all the sleeping pills, cursing or tears of a Sebastian Junger documentary she does reflect on the reality of escapism in wartime journalism.

to run away from marriages and mistakes, a place to forget your age, your responsibilities, your past, a country in which to reinvent yourself. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but the motives of most people were not likely to help a fragile and corrupt country stuck somewhere between the seventh century and Vegas.

So, naturally, there will be a Hollywood version of all her wartime adventures. And it will be produced by and star non other than, Tina Fey. We like Tina Fey. She is smart and funny. And somehow avoids being portrayed as attractive. Even though she is totally gorg.

Angel Haze is amazing. And not just because of this acoustic rap with Sasha Keable.

She is 22. She is from Detroit. She was in a grew up in a cultish born-again Christian community where she wasn’t allowed to listen to music. Then she left and taught herself how to rap. Also, she describes herself as pansexual. Enough said?

For a not so subtle indication that you like somebody.

If you already have somebody or you don’t want nobody then just dance alone. No mirror required. Because being hot for yourself would be strange.

Check the latest video from producer Julio Bashmore’s album Peppermint.

There is a reconfigured clapping baby doll with lasers coming out of its eyes.

Oh you don’t. Because you are not on Twitter trolling through newly added accounts and hashtags all day. Well we are. And we found this. It’s Accidental Morrissey. A collection of unintentional Morrissey moments.

From this tearful young soul harassed by a law enforcement officer.

To this helpful observation on pain medication.

Or this description of London’s median whether forecast.

Go see her and her main-squeeze Andrew Garfield in the Amazing Spider Man 2.

Not that you need convincing to go see the third generation of the comic. No that is not an error this is the THIRD GENERATION.

First.

Second.

Third.

See TOLD YOU SO. Now go see the it. #amazingmomentsworthpayingfor. #stoptakingallmymoneymarvel. #sinceiwas10.

Yup. You heard right. I have got it. All the Gossip. All right here. Well it is more like all the semi-interesting-celebrity-behaviour-over-the-last-24-hours. Let’s dissect.

If you were hoping to see Emma Stone’s naked selfie. That pictures was a fake. That is right. A FAKE. Like totally scandalous right.

But just because you ain’t gonna see Emma Stone’s nether-regions you do get to help Lena Dunham pick out her future child’s name. Well she calls it:

BUT Lena you are a celebrity.

So that doesn’t make sense. Oh well let’s keep pretending like you are a ‘normal’ girl without a rockstar boyfriend and a half-a-million-dollar-house. After all you do sport a green bikini. And you are not AS famous as Barbie.

So we will play along. I took what Lena referred to as the ‘cutest’ names and chose well, the cutest of the cute celebrity baby names.

This one is the BEST because it talks about literature (we like that at the Guardian), knights (the Queen likes that) and Maggie Gyllenhaal (She was just in England with her mom, holding hands *awe*).

In Harvey Weinstein’s humble opinion Django Unchained was the superior film to 12 Years a Slave.

Yes the man you had never heard of until that poll in Vanity Fair made you feel embarrassed to be clumped with 79% of Vanity Fair readers for not knowing who Harvey Weinstein is and forced you to learn his name thinks Quentin Tarantino’s blood-squirting, palomino riding hero Django is the more unbreakable oppressed character.

“To me, Django Unchained is a political masterpiece. I liked 12 Years a Slave, but Quentin covered a lot of that ground first, and dealt with violence, slavery and oppression, shining a light on the American holocaust, as he called it.”

The comment came about after the mega American producer weighed in on Quentin Tarantino’s recent script-leak-suing-scandal *shock* *awe* with Gawker over his NEXT western the Hateful Eight.

Nevertheless I am intrigued by this comparison so let’s explore.

This villain.

Or this villain.

This hardworking damsel.

Or this one.

Alright then now that you all feel just as sick to the stomach as I do about outlandish match up of slavery films lets start a campaign to shut Harvey Weinstein up. Well he did produce American Hustle or Captian Phillips or was it Her. No, no it was Philomena. And Judi Dench is in that so I guess he has some clout. And he did have two seats reserved at his own BAFTAs party (thanks for that one Hadley) so there may be no shutting him up.

They have been to outer space. They have taken Manhattan. They got arrested with Jason Segel and Amy Adams. And NOW they are coming to Landan-town! And they will be chillen with Ricky Gervais. And his perfectly groomed facial hair. And his white tuxedo. Because that is what the muppets do they hang with people in fancy clothing. And sing songs.

And now to prove how cool the Muppets are. I am going to make your eyes pop out of your head with a stream of gifs. YAY.

They head bang.

They play with dynamite and Julie Andrews.

They wear Chanel AND eat donuts - those things that came before the cro-nut.

They have hung out with Prince.

More times than he has performed in London.

And they even talked to him about serious matters like emancipation and stuff.

It’s Alexandra here, I have my neon sharpie and I am ready to rock your Friday with some devilishly delicious pop-culture bites. No I am not talking about those tasty pickled eggs.

As a matter of fact not everyone likes eggs. Some particularly dislike Scotch eggs. One gap-toothed Detroit rapper made it abundantly his disdain for the meat-covered-deep-fried eggs.

Maybe it’s the egg maybe it’s the scotch.

But it couldn’t be the scotch right?

And just in case you missed it the first, second time ‘round. Anchorman is back! That’s right from February 28 you can experience the magic of Ron Burgundy again. Well again, again. That should make everyone happy.

Even Danny Brown. We promise not too force-feed you scotch eggs anymore. Soz.